If we are ever to be truly united, we must first look at what divides us. Because of "ex pluribus unum", no other culture has stronger drive for conformity than the American. This fact remains unknown to someone who perhaps traveled casually to Orient (Chinese and Japanese are conform)and Europe but never understood spirit of other cultures. Truly conformity is bigger in Japan, but tolerance is much larger there than in any place in USA. People in small towns in the southern part of the United States help only their own, or to relatives or even family members but nonconformity issue is cardinal in dealing with outsiders. (Cargan & Ballantine, 2002) It is easier to die on lawn of a small town on a main street USA in full view of all bystanders, than on a platform of a New York subway. Contrary to that people in big city always help even to unknown people, if they appear not to be social parasites or commercial or dangerous. A typical European spends for Christmas on gifts to friends about $2-3000 including gifts to milkman, mailman, garbage man and plumber without planning a bribery. However, only meaningless gifts and knick-knacks are permissible in USA gift giving fearsome of bribery. Bechtel Corporation employees were giving gifts ranging between $15,000 to $50,000 to a major supervisor while choosing another subsupervisor of a new team. (Aronson, 1972)
In the book The Second Shift Arlie Hochschild (2003) superbly describes what so many of of us live but barely understand. She examines the demands of work in the home and outside, the gender identities that shape our feeling toward work, the goals that shape our chices and the intentions that define our commununication about responsiblity. The author validates the struggle of working women, without bashing men and talks about how to resolve the "stalled revolution" of shared responsibility both at home and in the workplace.................
